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Friday, September 17, 2010

Topics vs Motivation

Yesterday I failed to write a post.
It was due to to neither a lack of motivation nor a lack of topics to write about.
Yesterday's failure was, quite simply, an instance of adult life getting in the way of a hobby.
When I left work last night I had put in more than 45 hours AT work this week (For those reading this in the future: today is Friday). Note this does not include time spent checking email, etc after hours or on my lunch breaks.
Today was supposed to be a "flex" day to compensate for the hours I put in earlier in the week.
Sadly, I have too much work to do to accomplish that.
I have an application that requires a launcher script to use it. That application is needed for 3 weeks a year. One of those weeks is next week. The application installer works and it even correctly places the launcher script. The launcher script works on the machine where I wrote it and a small percentage of the sample machines I tried it on. But it does NOT work on the majority.  This frustrates me because it means my "flex" day has turned into a working day (from home, interrupted by errands that needed to get done, but still work).
Needless to say this is a serious demotivator. I work hard when I am working and I work a lot yet I am never getting ahead. It's even worse than that, actually, each time I attempt to get ahead I discover something else that is forcing me back further than I was before.

The post today started with its title because I knew, if I wished to continue my habit of writing, that I MUST write but I REALLY did not want to. My motivation failure is bleeding out of my office and into my personal life. This is a problem for I have no shortage of topics to write about; quite the opposite, actually.

But is let the demotivation win the motivation war I will fail to develop the habit of always writing thoughts down.

Here's my encouraging thought for the day: writing this post, however disjointed it might be, has helped me cope with the current futility of my job. I won the battle against my own apathy. If I can, so can you. It just takes a little bit of "mind over matter" or the Nike slogan "just do it" to overcome many internal obstacles.

Now I will go back to trying to figure out why my launching script is being an obnoxiously difficult <insert "colorful metaphor" here>.

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